PLANET 51

Planet 51 is towards the bottom when it comes to recent animated releases. It tells the story of an astronaut crash-landing on an alien planet where the aliens are green and cute, and also reminiscent in behavior to earthlings from the 1950’s. The indicator that it’s like the 1950’s USA is that there are lots of white-picket fences, gardening tending, moms wearing aprons, and some golden oldies pop references. Except it’s not Earth, it’s an alien planet, get it?

The crasher from the sky is Captain Chuck Baker (voiced by Dwayne Johnson) who is weirded out by all those green creatures. But the green creatures are just, you know, normal. Let’s jump ahead and let it be known that the action is very generic. When Captain Baker and Lem (Justin Long) first meet, they both freak, run the opposite direction up onto a staircase that meets in the middle, and they smack into each other. When Captain Baker is surrounded by authorities at a later time, he sneaks out the back door. The zenith in creativity are the dome-bubble cars that run through town, they look like halfway the work of Andrew Stanton.

This is really Lem’s story, for he is a nerdy astronomical observer whom in his beginnings tells his planetarium audience that the universe is a “couple of hundred miles wide.” Captain Baker isn’t just his friend, he’s his new source in space information that tells him of the limitless galaxy. Let’s now make room for new introductions. There is also a cute girl (Jessica Biel) who is non-violent resistant whom Lem is trying to impress. There is a villain and he’s played by General Grawl (Gary Oldman) who is on a sweep and destroy mission for Captain Baker’s blood. Let it be known that not even Gary Oldman does a lot with his part. Stealing the scene is a “Wall-E” type of miniature robot, assisting the Captain, participates in the movie’s major sight gags.

The spaceship to return Captain Baker is heavily guarded so the two of them, and maybe a few other friends, have to figure out a way to get Baker back up into space without being chased by General Grawl’s men. The military forces are, of course, incompetent and prone to shooting themselves. Visual jokes are just as lazy as the dialogue-driven jokes.

You could pat “Planet 51” on the back for coming up with lots of references to past movies, starting with “War of the Worlds” within the first scene. Despite all efforts, Steven Spielberg and George Lucas are unlikely to have much of a hardy har-har with this one. This may perhaps be a good movie for ages 7 to 8½, but I will have to confess. I laughed zero times at this movie. And worse, I smiled zero times. Although there’s a chance I would have enjoyed it more if I had a 7-year old sitting next to me so I could explain the jokes, and the non-jokes, to someone.

GRADE: D+